There have been too many goodbyes in my life.
As our PGI year comes to a close with mostly trying to clear ourselves from the hospital for more time for reviewing, finishing up paperwork and making discharge summaries, and packing stuff up from Abby or, in my case, from home, I find myself saying goodbye yet again.
For the record, I don't like saying goodbyes.
But slowly, surely, we have to. Arlyn has gone home to her son and family for a break before resuming her extensions, (though she would have preferred to take the boards this August), Emma is off having her own little vacation, Ligaya is saying goodbye to us tonight, as she is heading home and off to her Phuket vacation with Ria, and she most likely won't review with us (she's perfectly capable of passing without reviewing especially with that freakish brain of hers). All the rest of us left behind are left to fill up their spaces which are obviously hard to fill.
I lay in bed, feeling... well, "weak, small, and alone."
It feels like pieces of this nice year I've had are slowly being broken off into little pieces.
Removed from all other people in this life, I realized, we're simply alone. Single. Individual.
As I lay in my bed at 1:26 am, it hit me, this is ending. Should it have to? Can't it wait? Can't it go on? It was fun wasn't it? It was all about learning and helping and medicine? No answers to some questions. Uggghh, couldn't even think of something original. I had to borrow from all the other's bylines.
I slept.
I woke up.
I decided. It won't have to end. I will love my home for as long as I'll live. I'll remember SUMC and hope to come back again. I will take all those pieces and hold them dear to my heart. As they will be part of me.
It won't end, we'll see each other again guys, along life's trodden and not-so-beaten paths. I love you for being part of all this.
Though we are alone in this world, we gather strength in being together.
Some good things may never last, but sometimes, you just have to pick up where they left off.
No regrets.
1 comment:
waaaaaaahhhh!! this is the real brian calinawagan, ladies and gentlemen!
hehe bitaw kuya bri...
you put all our feelings so into words so eloquently. i'm almost tempted to review with u guys just so i can see u as often as i did sa sumc. i just can't shake off that strong belief that i'll end up sleeping in class and, after a stressful, traffic-ky ride home, sleeping at home. but i'll be showing up once in a while, methinks... if not sa cim then definitely kung asa mo mag-live-in, hehe, i'll make a mess sa inyo balay the way i did sa room 10 ahehehehe...
[live from bangkok, where ria is still sleeping like a pretty little log, we're off to chatuchak this morning, if we're ever waking up...] God bless u guys
Post a Comment