Me Thinking Not So Striaght Right Now Raelly

What I was thinking a couple of minutes before this post:

1) That the 2nd half of the boards are coming up this weekend, and I want it to be over, despite the fact that the results scare me more than the exams themselves.

2) Yes, as Gaya mentioned, by this time next week, things will have happened -- whether we all pass or not, whether we get to practice all of what we learned the past 5 years.

3) That I'm really having a difficult time studying for this final leg because there are 6 subjects, 5 days, and so many things to read. How do you fit a whole Pediatrics or Internal Medicine into one day? Not to mention the two subjects you'd have to fit in a day because 6 subjects and 5 days just don't agree with the basic principles of Math.

4) That I get visions of my testpapers getting all crumpled going into the machine that checks it and junks it. Well, I'm not saying that the score would be any better but I think I put a whole lot of thought into those answers and I'm hoping for a chance to get some correct.

5) That I'm praying for my friends and I to pass this test.

6) There are just 240-250 examinees in Cebu, a rumored 50 in Davao, reports of 1500 total examinees and some reports of 2100 in Manila. Either way, those figures pale in comparison to the 65,000 takers for the Nursing Boards and the 27,000 passers. Talk about a lopsided ratio.

Things I'm thinking of right now:

1) That the boards have been the main thing that has been going on in my life for the past 3 months, that I don't know what I would be doing after.

2) That I'm really scared of failing after realizing that I love doing this work, and I would want to do this for the better part of my life to come.

3) That if only the boards graded effort, desire, and service aside from the straight-from-the-hip-tricky multiple choice questions we would get a whole new breed of medicine. But there's just no grading system for that.

4) That I should be getting back to my books.