At The Beginning

All the roads that I've taken have come to a beginning, not an end, but yet another beginning. Another road that I'll soon be embarking on will be the way of the Internal Medicine Residency avenue. I don't know what it holds or whether I'll stay the course but I've never wavered and well, here we go again.

I've never really had a plan and admittedly, I've been winging it since high school, taking the courses I knew would pose reasonable challenges for me and keep me interested. The road took me through college, PT internship and boards, medical school and the medical boards -- with no regrets. I remember Michael J. Fox's movie, The Secret Of My Success, and I realized I've never had a secret, let alone a blueprint for whatever success I, we aspire for.

It's not that I'm questioning whether I love IM enough to make it a living, and I love the profession, but the uncertainty of what the future holds for everyone throws everything up in the air. But seeing most of my consultants (especially one monument of a gastroenterologist at SUMC) gladly peering over charts, taking joy in ordering TBDBIB, teaching interns like me on parenteral nutrition, and seeing the full trust in a patient's eyes when you explain a diagnosis, it all seems so worth it.

It has never been about the money for me. Yes, the naive idealism comes into play again, but truthfully, it never has been.

A couple of people think I should be in surgery because that's where the money's at, and I just politely smiled. Some have tried to convince me that money in the States is where it's at as well.

I can't say I've never dreamt of having a big house with a lawn and a pool, 5 cars, jetsetting all over the world, and living in a country where labor is more rewarded and a government that actually works. I have, but maybe I'll just take a vacation every now and then. It's about leaving something for the world to remember me by. Gaya calls it an impact in others lives for her. I don't know if it would be too much to ask for me to discover the cure for cancer or the common cold, would it? Haha, I'll just take making people remember me for the work I did as a human being, whether it be with a stethoscope draped around my neck or not.

I'm starting in exactly a day from now, and I'll be on duty on the first day. It's scary and exciting at the same time.

Here goes nothing.

:)